In your day-to-day activity, you might get pushed to the edge at times. Make sure this only occurs because of your own doing, and not because of someone else. It’s a shame to be in a state of depression or wacky stress because of how someone else is treating you. Regardless of how they’re treating you, for your own personal development, you have to overcome their influence.
It’s certainly okay if you make yourself crazy, based on self-imposed deadlines, added pressure, or taking risks that you haven’t before, because these are under your control, and you can always pull back when you feel that it’s too much. On the other hand, it isn’t okay when you allow someone else to do this to the point where you’re feeling helpless, because no one has more relevance in your life than you.
See If The Other Person Is Just Passing Craziness On To You.
If someone is making you crazy, take a look at if they’re feeling crazy themselves. If they’re just passing some negativity or unhelpful pressure onto you, but aren’t feeling it themselves, that’s pretty rude of them, and you also shouldn’t allow this to occur. Sometimes people are the last to see that they’re having a detrimental effect on someone else. While I would say that most want to be helpful to others, some have a want of passing on their own anguish that’s greater than their want to help, so you end up getting the anguish.
Don’t Let Regret Build Up.
No one wants to look back in a few years to see that someone was draining their energy without giving much back. You’ll either distance yourself from the person, or become angry, and these are both unhealthy. The sooner you prevent someone from even having the capability of driving you crazy, the sooner you take control of the relationship, and your own production capacity.
Keep An Eye On Your Own Potential Negative Influence.
A little extension of this concept is that you shouldn’t be making others crazy. If you’re passing on too much anguish or pressure to another person, you can be certain they’re noticing it, and they’re probably pulling away from you. People have to put their health first, and can only handle so much use of their resources before they see you as an energy-sink.
The only person who should make you crazy is you, and only for a manageable period of time. Do everything in your power to keep it that way.
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G'day! I'm Gordie, founder and editor-in-chief of Lifestyle Design For You. I want to welcome you to the center of the universe when it comes to lifestyle design and personal development blogs. We're a team of ten writers providing you with articles to help nourish your mind and improve your life. Lifestyle design is about designing your life so you can do what you want when you want. 
{ 40 comments… read them below or add one }
A timely post as I’m about to drive myself crazy with some glitches over at the blog.
But I’ll be fine, no worries. It’s true that situations can be quite pressuring at times, but if we manage to control our emotions, preventing negative influences to affect others that will be ideal. As you said, positive ‘craziness’ is good at times, say no to negative ones.
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Ching Ya´s last blog ..How Blog Review Can Help to Improve Blog Traffic
Hi Ching Ya,
It’s great you’re keeping a positive mindset. I think technology can make one crazy, very crazy, especially when it goes wrong.
My oldest daughter and I were just talking about this today. (She’s 11) I’ll have her read this. Maybe she’ll think it’s fun to ask, “Is this person trying to give me crazies?” (lol – instead of cooties) I tell you what, I get crazy b/c the kids today are so emotionally sophisticated. When kids at school pick on other kids they do so calculated and manipulative. When I was in school they just pored glue in your hair. I definitly agree with your post and urge myself and others to talk about crazies blocking with our babies.
Cheers! gm
GM Baker´s last blog ..Anatomy of A Blog Post: SEO Optimized
Hi GM,
It sounds like bringing up kids today sounds tougher than ever. Let’s hope your daughter finds a way to deal with those trying to drive her crazy at school.
Hi GM.
That was good stuff right there. “Let’s go pour glue in her hair” versus “Let’s hack into her iPhone and set it so that every time she tries to send a text message it starts up the Word Scramble game app”.
Armen Shirvanian´s last blog ..What You Do Is As Intricate As You Make It
Nice Post Armen
I’d also add to this – Realise they might be having a bad day.
It’s really easy sometimes to accept other people’s crazy and become crazy ourselves. We do this because we attach emotion to the crazy they’ve give us. When there’s no emotion then it very hard to become crazy yourself.
There could be a 101 reasons why they’re having a crazy day. Maybe they’ve just had some crazy dumped on them or maybe something really bad has happened to them recently that they’re not sharing. If we can identify why these people are crazy on a particular day then it will help us separate our emotions from the situation – thus not becoming crazy ourselves
Ben Lumley´s last blog ..Taking the red pill – lessons for life from the Matrix
Hey Ben,
That’s true in someways, but I still don’t like the reason that because someone’s having a bad day, they take it out on someone else. There are exceptions of course, such as losing one’s job, someone close dying, break up of a long term relationship, etc, but even then people need to do their best not to spread their negative craziness to others.
Cheers. Thanks for visiting, Ben!
Oh completely Gordie.
I don’t think it’s acceptable to download your crazy on to someone else. People need to learn to deal with their own things and keep their emotions in check. But don’t we all get crazy sometimes? Don’t we all spread that crazy around from time to time? Some people just don’t understand and know how to control their negativity.
I think for me, I’d rather control something that I can control. I can’t control someone’s crazy. The only person who can do that is themselves. The only thing I can control is my reactions to that craziness. I have full control over that.
Ben Lumley´s last blog ..Taking the red pill – lessons for life from the Matrix
That’s true, Ben. We can’t control people’s actions, we can only control our reactions.
I love the photo Gordie.
I’ve found that for some people., the thing that drives them crazy is that they dwell in the past. It’s because they can’t let it go it leads them to negativity in the present. It has a debilitating effect that affects their lifestyle and drives all peace from their life.
Sire´s last blog ..Winners, Those Who Never Give Up
Hey Sire,
Yes, hanging on to all the shit that’s happened in the past can drive away happiness. I used to do that sometimes in my twenties. I don’t know why, but it sure wasn’t the best use of my time.
Hi Armen/Gordie,
“If someone is making you crazy, take a look at if they’re feeling crazy themselves.” – Yeah, this message definitely hits home. So far, I’ve managed to keep myself away from crazy people, but there is just one last person that I can’t stay away from, unfortunately, because I’m married to that person. haha. Just kidding. I guess I’m the one who’s crazy after all. Anyway, you are right with what you said about determining if the other person is just trying to infect you with their state of mind. As they say, “Misery loves company,” and one must learn to create some kind of protective shield against that.
Peace and respect,
Ryhen
Ryhen | Mind Power´s last blog ..Do You Think You Are Special?
Hey Ryhen,
I totally agree than negative people attract negative people. It would be really hard being married to a negative person and trying to keep oneself positive. It’s good to see that you’re not in that situation, Ryhen.
Hey Armen and Gordie!
This is a post that should be read daily as a reminder to keep ourselves grounded in positive vibes.
I once allowed things to easily get me fired up, but I gave that up many years ago after being cut-off in traffic. After fuming and using a few choice words, I looked at myself in the rear view mirror and wondered who that clown was. The incident was over so I could not do anything about it anyway at that point, other than to fill myself with negative energy. That turned out to be a big turning point for me because I truly felt badly afterward. Decided right then and there that I never wanted to see that guy again.
Armen, you raise some great points, particularly about keeping an eye on your own negative influence. I see people acting as I once did in a car, while the kids are in the back watching. What does that really teach them?
I have shared this story with others over the years to illustrate that the loss of control and negativity comes from within.
Although challenging at times, the goal is to never let someone else take away your joy.
Jimi Jones´s last blog ..Protection for Images
Hi Jimi.
That traffic example sure is fitting. I sure have been real annoyed in traffic a couple of times, and it’s like I was a different person there.
What a winning point you bring up there about seeing people doing as we once did. I think it is sort of comical(at first) for us when we see someone do something we used to do long ago that wasn’t too great for our own health or calmness. There was a time when I thought it was real cool when people had loud subwoofers in their cars, and now I stay away from extremely loud bass because it isn’t good for the ears hearing.
A lot of things that once annoyed me are now actually wonderful when I handle them peacefully. Everyone notices when you can handle something that should be annoying in a way of relaxation or even comedy. We get multiple frustration tests during the day, and when we pass them, the potential annoyance has no foundation.
Thanks for the kind words.
Armen Shirvanian´s last blog ..What You Do Is As Intricate As You Make It
I get frustrated and crazy more at technology than people now. When the Internet connection keeps dropping, my blood starts to boil. I have to do all not to put my fist through my monitor.
I dated a guy once who would tell me how I ruined his day. I would inadvertently say something to get his panties all knotted up. I always responded with how sad his life was that he let me have so much control over his day. Yeah, that always went over real well, too.
Misery love company and it spreads like wildfire. But a smile is contagious, too. Prioritize your life. Then crazy will be what happens when you talk to your kids and they say things like ‘a planetarium is where they have fish, right?’ and you almost shoot soda out your nose as you burst into laughter while explaining the subtle differences between a planetarium and an aquarium. {true story}
Anne´s last blog ..How to Rid Yourself of Negativity and Let the Happiness Inside
Hi Anne.
That’s pretty hilarious about how he would say you had ruined his day. On the other hand, I can see how that would get annoying. You are right about the way you told him that he shouldn’t have let you have so much control over how his time went.
For a second there, I had forgotten what a planetarium was, but don’t worry, I looked it up, and that sure would be classic to answer. Those are some entertaining opportunities.
Our attitude certainly does spread. I’m not trying to spread frustration. I’d say more like boldness or self-discipline(those are my two key thought words lately).
Armen Shirvanian´s last blog ..What You Do Is As Intricate As You Make It
Welcome, Anne!:)
“A smile is contagious too”. It’s true except for with Tony Soprano.
To date I’ve shot no beverage out of my nose, but I’m looking forward to it.
ooohh I can see your tonsils. LOL only kidding.
Letting other people affect you in a negative way is really just your own fault. You ahve the means and resources to not let that happens, as well as to turn the situation around and make something positive out of it.
Some very good points. I especially like, Don’t let regret build up.
Robert Bravery´s last blog ..Image editing software for bloggers.
Hi Robert.
You gotta love the images here. They sure aren’t from Flickr. In the picture it looks like someone just deleted a bunch of completed work in Gordie’s “My Documents” folder.
Good call about having the resources to not let that happen. I like that way of seeing it. We have all the tools we need to not be influenced negatively by external forces.
I sure don’t let regret build up. When I see it, I toss it into the Recycle Bin on my desktop(well I set it to remove the Recycle Bin icon on my desktop since long ago, but if I did have one there, that is where the regret would go).
Armen Shirvanian´s last blog ..What You Do Is As Intricate As You Make It
Hi Robert,
My tonsils were taken out when I was seven. Perhaps they’ve grown back.
Letting people have control over your emotions is a bit like volunteering to be that person’s slave. Sometimes, one may even need to remove that person from their life.
One main thing: Stay away from black clouds.
I agree, don’t let anger/regret ANYTHING build up. Release the tension as it comes!
Financial Samurai´s last blog ..Be Yourself, It’s Always The Best Way To Go
Yes, there are so many anger control methods out there. Deep, slow breathing is a place to start.
I just resort to working from home or a coffee shop. Not everyone has that luxury but dealing with unwanted drama and stress is not worth it. Only caps productivity and slow down forward progress. Don’t forget the good ol sucker punch trick
The Real Josh´s last blog ..Develop A Story In Order To Sell More Products
Hey Josh,
I think working from home, can undo 80-90% of your stress levels. No traffic to fight; no anal retentive colleagues to deal with. I love working at home.
Amen to that. Although if your significant other works from home too that can get interesting at times. Ha. Usually though its awesome!
The Real Josh´s last blog ..Develop A Story In Order To Sell More Products
Hi
When I started reading this, I right away thought of my children and how crazy they can make me sometimes
However, I think Ben touched on an important point. As much as it’s not acceptable for other people to put their crazy on to you, everyone has their own unique story that we may not be aware of.
Gordie, you talked of the time in your 20s when things were tough. I don’t know if, with hindsight, you can pin point what specifics were happening at that time to make things tougher (and I’m not asking you to do it here btw
) but imagine if someone at that time had laid into you about not passing your negativity around, how would that have made you feel?
What your article doesn’t address is how one should respond if we do recognise that another person is giving us the crazy. Should it be talked about or is recognising it sometimes enough to diffuse the problem?
I don’t know the answer but it’s an interesting discussion so thank you for starting it
Eleanor Edwards´s last blog ..Day 14 in the Give A Brick House
Hi Eleanor,
I think it depends on what your relationship to that person is. If it were your boss, I wouldn’t bring it up with him, but rather be aware. If it was getting too much, I’d start looking for a new job.
If it’s someone like a spouse, then I think you could lovingly tell them about how their negativity and offer to help them.
With teenagers, I have no idea. Hormones and rebellion make it hard to be reasoned with.
You know what I live myself by a few simple codes or rules.
One that relates to this one is ‘If it doesn’t affect me, then it doesn’t affect me’
People are different, I agree with Ben that people do have bad days. If someone has an annoying laugh or doesn’t tidy up their work station at the end of every shift, then so what. Roll with it and remember that life is way to short and I mean WAY to short to even thinking about it.
TheInfoPreneur´s last blog ..In 18 Days I have …..
Hey James,
Yes, I like your code. I don’t know why we get so upset at people’s little quirks such as a strange laugh or a messy desk. I think those kinds of things don’t need to affect me and are trivial and not worth getting one’s knickers in a twist over.
A timely post as I have someone in my life who is driving me crazy and exhausting me, but I’m learning that they have to live their own life and quit dragging me into their drama.
Rose´s last blog ..Faking Death Online
Hi Rose,
Stay strong, Rose.
Thanks…. Trying to.
Rose´s last blog ..Alexa Ranking Explained
If we all associate with positive people, this post wouldn’t be relevant. But the fact is we don’t and we all need to be around the right people. People to help us when whee down. And give us a shoulder to cry on when we are feeling sad. All we need a posiitve association and 99 percent of our problems would diminish!
Hi Jonathan,
Yes, that’s exactly what Tony Robbins says.
it took me a long time to realize someone else had control over my emotions and feelings and just plain life. I don’t need it. It has been a struggle but I am regaining my self respect. You write awesome points thanks so much.
Hi Winnie,
You stay strong, girl. You are worthy of self-respect and the respect of others.
I’m actually going through a rough time in my life right now where I keep explaining to myself that I do have control of my situation and sometimes it’s hard to cope with what I’m going through.
I’m sure with faith and hard work I can get through it though.
Taking control of your own life and not allowing someone else to make you feel upset just because is something we should all learn to do a little better.
Eric´s last blog ..The Way I Blog With Ease
Hey Eric,
I appreciate the great comments you’ve been leaving on my blog today. Gives me some weekend interaction when things are slower.
Sometimes the hardest thing is not learning what to do but doing what we know we should do. This especially applies to relationships.